The early days of the internet were like the Wild West. As more and more people explored this new digital frontier, clashes of culture, belief, and language became inevitable. Eventually a loose framework of rules developed to help guide online social interactions and expectations, and “netiquette” was born (a portmanteau of “internet” and “etiquette”).
Netiquette is a rather old-fashioned term these days, along with “surfing the web” and the “information superhighway”. Still, in an era where social media platforms have devolved into increasingly nasty battlegrounds and social engineering cyberattacks only get worse every year, perhaps it’s time we took a step back and reminded ourselves what netiquette means.
Keep reading, and I’ll take a look at some of the rules of netiquette, why they matter, and hopefully help ensure everyone has a positive experience online.
What is netiquette?
Basically, netiquette is a code of conduct for the internet. As Hector Barbossa once said, however, this code is more what you’d call a “guideline” than an actual set of rules.
The “laws” of netiquette aren’t legally binding, not everyone abides by them, and some free-speech absolutists believe that any kind of rule is only put in place to stifle debate. The point of netiquette is simply to try and make the internet a nicer place for everyone by ensuring that conversations don’t devolve into arguments and insults.
The point of netiquette is simply to try and make the internet a nicer place for everyone
Now, despite not being laws in the traditional sense, the rules of netiquette can still be stringently enforced depending on where you are. Reddit is a great example of this – especially as the expected etiquette differs from subreddit to subreddit. Some of these communities will have rules that are rigidly enforced, while others might be far more laissez-faire in their approach to keeping things polite.
Netiquette can also apply to employees who use the internet for work when they’re talking to the general public and their colleagues. Even if you’re simply a member of Joe Public on one of the many various social media platforms, each will have its own spoken and unspoken rules of what is acceptable and what isn’t.
Why does netiquette matter?
It’s all too easy to forget that there are real people on the other side of that screen we all spend so much time sitting in front of. Every article and post you interact with wasn’t written by a computer or spat out by an algorithm (though in this age of ChatGPT that might not be true for much longer). You’re interacting with someone just like you, even if the conversation is taking place solely through text on a subreddit or in a Discord channel.
Netiquette matters because it’s all too easy to respond in the heat of the moment – to type something and hit send before you stop to think about whether it’s a good idea or not.
Is it going to upset someone or make them angry? Have you said too much and possibly put your data or personal details at risk? The point of netiquette is to help all internet users make better decisions and have better online interactions.
The golden rules of netiquette
As mentioned above, the rules of online etiquette differ depending on the site you’re using, the social group you’re interacting with, and even your age. However, some are universal no matter where you are or who you’re talking to.
1. Read before you respond
Before you post an angry, inflammatory reply to a post, take a moment to make sure that you’ve read it through at least twice before you hit that post button.
The internet is still, by and large, a text medium, and sometimes it can be easy to misinterpret tone or intention, especially when closely held beliefs or emotions are at play.
Take a moment to consider whether or not the person is being totally sincere in that thing they’ve just said. Could they be joking or being sarcastic? It could even be they’re simply trying to stir up controversy and all your reply will do is add fuel to the fire.
2. Think before you post
Think about how you interact with people in real life. Most of us don’t leave our house in the morning determined to pick fights with strangers or hurl insults and off-color comments at anyone who doesn’t agree with us. We also don’t blurt out every thought that enters our head to a room full of strangers.
Anything you post online stays online – it’s hard to erase anything off the web permanently.
This is especially important to remember when posting online. The intent of a message can easily be lost when it’s communicated via text. Something that seems like an obvious joke to you when you think it or say it out loud might come across as cruel or insulting when sent to a stranger through text.
The simplest rule to remember here is this – if you wouldn’t say it to someone in real life, maybe don’t post it online. Don’t be a troll.
You also need to remember that anything you post online stays online – it’s hard to erase anything off the web permanently. This is doubly important when it comes to oversharing. Once you blurt out something rude without thinking, if you share too much, or share with someone you shouldn’t, it’s almost impossible to take it back. Jobs have been lost and lives destroyed by ill-considered comments and people sharing things they shouldn’t.
3. Respect privacy – yours and everyone else’s
You wouldn’t hand over your address and bank details to someone in the street just because they asked you for them, would you? Always make sure to think before you share your personal information online. This can include things like your name, your email address, date of birth, and even pictures of yourself and where you live. Even details you think inconsequential can be used by cybercriminals to carry out scams or steal your identity.
This goes for anyone else’s information as well, and doubly so if you don’t have permission from the other person to share things. That holiday snap of you both on the beach might be a lovely moment that you really want to share, but it could let a criminal know that neither you nor your friend are at home.
It’s also worth checking any images for information in the background (on screens, etc) before posting them to social media, and maybe wait till you’re back home before posting those holiday pics on Facebook.
4. Don’t spread misinformation
It’s more important than ever in the age of “fake news” and AI-generated articles to make sure that you’re not spreading information that’s misleading or malicious.
If you want to comment on something, share your opinion, or share an interesting post or news story, take a moment to double-check the source. Do a search of the topic and check out a selection of different sites to make sure the information is consistent across all outlets.
Make sure that the outlets you’re referencing are credible
Also, make sure that the outlets you’re referencing are credible, and that you understand the site’s particular ideology and political leanings. The same story can be reported in very different ways from one site to another.
Doing this ensures that you’re not mindlessly contributing to the spread of misinformation. This helps you come across as someone whose posts can be trusted to be accurate and helps to reduce the spread of what’s commonly known as FUD (Fear, Uncertainty, Doubt).
5. Don’t make it personal
This is one of the most important rules of netiquette – and one of the toughest to follow. Arguments online can be heated, you may be absolutely convinced of the certainty and rightness of your argument but never make the mistake of making it personal. When someone throws an insult, they’re basically admitting that they have nothing else to add to the conversation and no other way to argue their point of view.
The internet should rightly be an exchange of ideas and viewpoints, and you’re going to find ones that you don’t agree with. You might even encounter people who hold beliefs and values that are anathema to everything you think or feel – but attacking them on a personal level will never change their minds. Would you listen to someone’s argument if they called you names or threw insults at you?
Of course not. The easiest mistake to make here is to view an online argument or discussion as something that has a definitive right or wrong answer, as a challenge to be beaten or won when the truth is, as philosopher Karl Popper once said, the aim of an argument, or a discussion, should not be victory but progress.